When Friends Divorce

Tonight, I'm having dinner with my friend Kevin Nordlie. Tomorrow, I'm going to a show with my friend Cindy Nordlie. Kevin and Cindy used to be married. Technically, they still are. But in reality, not so much.

I used to take credit for Cindy and Kevin. They are both very introverted. We all worked together many years ago. Cindy would laugh at Kevin's jokes. Not that Kevin's jokes weren't funny, but she would laugh more than they were funny. So I began to catch on that perhaps there was some interest here. I had dated Kevin previously. I knew he was a good guy. And I liked Cindy, who was new to our team. Kevin also seemed interested. The three of us used to do things together. One time, when I got tired of the two of them waiting, I just didn't go. The three of us made plans, and I stayed home. I forced them to go on a "date" - sort of. Kevin then invited Cindy to a show, and Cindy came to me to analyze whether that was really a date. "Of course!" I said. And so it was.

Cindy and Kevin dated for many years. Were they ever going to take it to the next level? Cindy got tired of waiting, broke it off, and dated someone else for a little while. And the three of us were still friends, though the two of them did not talk much. Somehow this worked.

After about six months apart, they got back together. I forget the circumstances precisely. This was a long time ago. On a trip to the Rockies, Kevin finally did propose.

I was maid of honor for their wedding. I helped with a lot of the planning, which I guess is par for the course as maid of honor. I was also in charge of dancing at the reception. Cindy and Kevin are introverts. They didn't want to be the center of attention. Even at their own wedding! If it had been up to them, they would have skipped the first dance altogether. Instead, we compromised and the wedding party joined them in the first dance after they had taken a few turns. From then on, my job at the reception was to keep the dancing going. Which was okay, because I love to dance.

Cindy and Kevin were married for more than 10 years. They were together for about 20. And now they are divorcing.

And yet I am still friends with both of them. And I still see both of them about once a month. Ironically, every time I have seen one of them since they went their separate ways, I've seen the other one the next day. So it's almost as it was - with the three of us going out. Just a few hours apart.

Okay, not so much.